that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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