By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
