when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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