IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize