Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize