I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.