So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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