we have officially lost it.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Randomize
