Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
