K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Randomize
