Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Oh god it's open bar.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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