Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
tell me about the fingering
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