hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
