the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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