i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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