Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Randomize
