I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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