She said her name was "party"
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
