Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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