I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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