he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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