just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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