That's intense
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
