Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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