if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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