Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Randomize
