I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
