as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
