Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
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