Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize
