Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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