I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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