do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
