the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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