Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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