I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Randomize
