So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
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