Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
