so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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