Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize