Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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