im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
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