I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
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I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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