bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
You're like the curious george of whores
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
