Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
