wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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