Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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