quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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