my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Randomize