My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
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