I chose taco bell over sex...
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.